I was thinking, wouldn't it be nice if both Hubby and I got a office hour job, better if same place, and den we can put Jayr in nearby childcare. After work, both of us pick Jayr up and den go have dinner together. Weekends will be our family day. Perfect right? Den financial wise will be such an big issue no more. Things will definitely goes well, with no interference of more babies! lol.
Well, last night i was thinking bt this as well. Do i really want another baby? No doubt the more the merrier and Jayr wont be so bored playing alone. But den, i dun think i am prepared to have another. Like a baby needs alot of attentions and love, but i have given all to my darling Jayr and i doubt i will love the 2nd one as much. U get wat i mean? Like although he/she will be my own flesh and blood too, but den i have already love Jayr with all my soul and heart, that i dunno how to accept another one. Now u know??? argh. So difficult to specify this topic to let you fully understand. Anyway, i have to admit, no matter how many im gonna have in future, i think Jayr will still be my no.1 love. hee. Bias huh? too bad. And den it will be a sad case for the no.2 bcuz i will be doting and loving Jayr so much so that i dun see he/she in my eyes. Will it be that bad??? i dunno lah. thats wat i reckon. If i have the right to say or choose, i will NOT have another one. Note my words. But bcuz family thing is not only to my concern but also to hubby's, thus i am left in dilemma.
Jayr will be starting on step 3 next month. Yes! My baby, ar nope, my boy is turning 1 leh! So fast, din realise time passed so soon. All along i was like catching with his growing pace and learning together with him. At times, i do feel that i was growing up with him too. I've learnt alot. Having a baby is the most precious gift ever. He, amazingly, taught me alot and ease my hot temper as well. You need not fret how to be a good parent, cuz ur baby will teach you how to be one. There is no perfect parent, but a special one in their lil heart. Sometimes, mayb of my unpleasant past that i do not wish Jayr will have a tiny share of it, i tend to spoil him and go by his way. Which is a big NO-NO! You have to teach ur baby and lead them the right path. Maby, just mayb bcuz i am so afraid that Jayr will hate me somehow or love me not enough. He is my closest kinship after all. If all things failed, i will still have Jayr....... Just me and him.
So like, im thinking whether to continue with Enfagrow or try him on Pediasure. What's ur say!?
p/s: Any office hour job for us???
p/p/s: Ms I, i will do a list soon and let you choose. Meanwhile gotta wait till i move there den can meet up for books exchange ok? Bcuz i have already packed most things in boxes :p thats y... thanks anyway!
Jacky's Wife