.Saturday, December 27, 2008 Y
Totally loathe myself today. Argh.Well, there supposed to have a wedding dinner to attend tomo, but i refused to go and somehow lala-ed with hubby bt this. argh. Its like dun expect me to go when almost half the earth knows that poor Ines has got no better clothes for that kinda function and no make-ups to at least cover my pale sickening face! wth.It only makes me feel low and low and lower again! ffff.It wasnt meant to be like this! Not like this! Why am i avoiding the crowd or why am i hiding in the shithole!!! damn mad at myself. damn mad at my destiny!Can you imagine a va-va-vroom, man's hunger, confident Ines became like this!!! Like this piece of shit here typing and ranting forever! argh. I dunno what i did to deserve this. Heaven took away my youth, my freedom, my hobbies, my friends, and den now dun even bother to save my look and appearance! ccb.Totally devastated.idreamtbtyouagainandagainandthistimeitbecomesmorefrequentthatitfeltsorealsotrueineedtoknowwhatdoesitmeanihaveforcedmyselftoforgetanddenwhyareyoubacktotauntmeeveninmydreamdoyouknowhowbaditfeelstoonlysuppressmyfeelingsandrecallallthosedaysidunthinkicansuppressanymoreiknowyouarelivingupwellandyoudunevenbothertorecallallthebestandgoodbyepls
Jacky's Wife