.Thursday, August 28, 2008 Y
Dragged myself to on the lappy. Forced myself to logon to blogger.com. Told myself that i must blog everyday and today! *yawn*I am so super sleepy. Didn't manage to sleep well cuz Hubby was down with flu and fever last nigh, thus bb didn't have the chance to hug daddy and smell daddy too. In the end, he woke up numerous time. Guessed he was looking for daddy again:( i had a hard time to make him sleep back many times in the night. so tao yan hubby last night nah! den this morning when hubby woke up for his reservice, i have to woke up and wash bb's bottle, and ya, the disaster happened again. Jayr woke up too! this time worst, no matter how i coaxed him, he also dun wan to sleep nor lie down. must carry one! i dunno why, but we seldom do that hor. just have no idea why he was so like that in the morning. hai. and den guessed? i suffered his craps till 10.30am!!!! wth. and den just as i was about to drift further on into my dreamland, he woke up at 11.30am!!!!! kaoz! how to sleep!!! den i went out to prepare water and all to bath for him and den fed him a milk and den played with him till abt 1pm den he willingly closed him eyes and sleep. wth again. really can die! its not very good to be a stay at home mum though:(I flared at Hubby this morning. Cuz i was super tired. Cuz Jayr kept giving me his craps. Cuz i totally gave up and not know what to do anymore. And i was thinking why the hell must i brought this shit to torture myself. And hubby said something on the phone like, "u chosed to be a stay at home mum, den u have to expect these ma....". i was weeping terribly though. that was why i shouted at him. cuz it was not my choice, it is because we have NO other choices! if i can go out and work, u think i dun wan meh? staying at home is not a very happy choice ok. I starves, i thirst, i tired, i so helpless. U think so good ah! fuck all~! arrrrrghh!Anyway, sorry lao gong. i shouldn't have vent my anger on you. i should have been more understanding. I should have think it is absolutely fine to sacrifice for Jayr and you... whatever. im sorry ok. i love you and jayr always....i know u're reading this. :) u must be thinking why i dun go sleep now right? cuz jayr will be up in a while time for his feeding again!!!! how to sleep? and den have to play with him again....... wth. can Heaven pls send down an angel to save me! pretty pls.........
Jacky's Wife